When you have to do your best, at your worst.

It has been more months than I wish to count, enduring the aftermath of an accident that only took ten seconds to change our lives. It has taken us by shock and surprise; and no degree of knowledge or past experiences could have trained us to face this reality. Nothing can prepare you. You can…

Two steps forward, One step back

We completed one year of our (secret) married life in May; living together, enjoying the snow, finding new hobbies, falling in sync and completely depending on each other. Four years after being in the US, we returned home for a vacation in December of 2014 and got married (again), the Indian way. Also, After a…

Day 98: Anger

The accident changed our lives. Jitish’s, mine, our families, and the life of the nineteen year old. For the first three weeks, I didn’t care enough to find out who hit us. The ‘who’ didn’t matter to me. Only Jitish mattered. I decided ignorance was the best route at that point. It was easy to…

Guilt

Guilt consumes you. It has no mercy. It doesn’t wait for an empty moment to strike. It takes over every thought and fills it with regret and an overwhelming sensation of loss. What’s worse is that no amount of guilt can change the past. No amount of brooding, depression, or victimization will change what happened….

Despite the fact

Despite the grave misfortune of meeting with the accident, every moment since has been a course correction. And the mighty forces seem to have extended a helping hand. Fortunately, we were close to one of the leading Neuro trauma hospitals in the country. He was medflighted  under eight minutes. I was carrying the only phone…

Day 0 – happiness to horror

Sunday had started out perfectly. Especially when it was followed by a perfect Saturday. It was a beautiful summer day; after months of cold winter. It was a welcome sign to get out of the house and into the warm hands of summer. We headed to Lake Mills in Wisconsin, about an hour from our…

Never did I think…never ever

Never did I think that I would start writing a blog in search for strength and hope. More than anything, to help me accept this new reality. I had often thought about writing a blog on more frivolous and mundane subjects. A travel journal or a recipe blog perhaps. But never did I think I…

Taking the First Step

  I am sure it is pure joy to watch your child take the first step. Surely, there must be a deep sense of pride and fulfillment to watch your child learn to balance and stand up; developing physical independence and self-sufficiency. Those moments must bring tears in the parent’s eyes. Tears of joy. I hope…

Keeping Hope

“Accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope. “ Martin Luther King, Jr. Life at Lifecare was short-lived. Over the course of the next few weeks, Jitish had started to engage his left torso and limbs. He started to wriggle out of his hand-cast and brace. Started to fold and flatten his left feet repeatedly,…

Drawing his first breath

 “Freedom is strangely ephemeral. It is something like breathing; one only becomes acutely aware of its importance when one is choking.” William E. Simon   After the accident, at the hospital, everything was too unreal. Every spike in cranial pressure or irregularity in blood pressure had to be solved immediately. Doctors would rush in. They…